A Light in the Dark
by whiteg0ld
Summary: Bella has always loved one man... but what happens when he suddenly changes? What happens when he loses his mind? Will she turn and flee? Or will the arrival of a hero change her world forever? Canon pairings.
1. Chapter 1: Darkness

_What happens when you lose the one you love?_

"It was Jeff wasn't it?" His voice was a poisonous whisper to my ears.

_What happens when that person was all you lived for?_

"Tell me who it was! Tell me if I caught the right one!" He was yelling now, his body being wracked by strange shudders.

I forced my eyes open against the dim light that had snuck in through the pitiful window on the south side of the dingy room.

"You… you… you will… **never…** know." I said, my voice rough from disuse. His head snapped back from its position against his chest, and his glowing eyes turned to lock with mine from across the room.

He didn't say anything. Thinking he would be done interrogating me for today, I slumped back down into the chair, feeling the splinters of old wood dig into my back. Normally this would have caused me some pain, but I was so used to it by now that these days I wouldn't feel it if an elephant sat on my head.

It was too late to look up, too late to cringe, too late to move out of the way. There was absolutely no warning at all. His hand came flying out of the darkness and hit the side of my face with a sickening thud. I'd forgotten how well he could move in the darkness, forgotten how quiet he could be when he put in the effort.

I flew through the air and hit the brick wall. From the sound of it, a bone was broken. My body immediately slid to the ground, and because of my impenetrable weakness, I could not move it, I could not order it under my control, nothing. My brain was saying one thing, but my muscles did not understand the order.

I heard a small scuffle, and within seconds of it, something large and dark landed beside me.

His hand grabbed the hair on my head and pulled it up so that my eyes were level with his.

At that point I could not suppress a gasp of agony at being moved.

He grinned, showing perfect white teeth that glimmered in the shadows.

"That, is what I like to hear." He said huskily. "Now, you understand, I'm only doing this for your protection? There's no other way my dear. All you have to do is tell me who he was… and I'll let you go."

I put on my brave face and glared at him with as much defiance as I could muster.

He let me go with a snort.

I sighed in relief.

"Well, I really was hoping it wouldn't come to this, but, I guess you just can't help yourself can you?" He said it lightly, with an air of feigned unimportance.

I struggled to push myself up against the wall, gritting my teeth to stop the pain from forming sounds.

"And where do you think your going?" He asked roughly. His hands came up to slam my body further into the wall. " I think I haven't had my fill of you yet."

I knew what was coming next. My mind began to go through a familiar routine: lockdown mode.

His breath tickled my ear, coming out in pants rather than levelled breaths. His hands began sliding down my body.

"I'm telling you, you could save yourself all this pain if you just told me."

I didn't reply, I didn't care anymore. He paused for half a second.

"That's your final answer?"

He began moving faster now, unafraid of what the future would hold.

It was going to happen again. One more time, one more night. My mind was quickly getting engulfed in shadows.

Lock away the memories, erase everything. Make your mind blank. That's what I had been told. If you go through an unpleasant experience, shut yourself off from the real world, reside inside yourself. I was almost ready now, almost there, I just had one more memory floating across the vast extent of my memoir.

A face, smoother than baby oil, the color of caramel, with warm brown eyes, and long, black hair that glistened under the sun. A face of a man I once knew. He was smiling, and when he smiled, it seemed the whole world came alive, as if he were the father of nature. His mouth was moving now, forming a question.

_Who is it? Did you pick the right one? Who is it?_

He was speaking to me, and, in the trance that I was, I heard myself reply.

_Who is what?_

He turned to me with an expression that took my breath away, so much love and wonderment. His hand came up and gently traced my cheek. I felt his touch as that of a ghost.

_Whom do you love?_ He asked.

I waited, not wanting to leave this wonderful world, where everything was in its rightful place.

I heard my dream self begin to speak, and just as I held my breath to hear the answer, the memory was shuffled away into some dark recess of my mind, maybe never to be seen again.

It didn't matter, I knew what the answer was.

_Whom do you love?_ He had asked.

I knew the answer. It lay in every action I did, every fiber of my being; I knew the answer.

_Oh, Jacob. I love you._

And then the dream world became reality, and something was pushing into me, and the pain was uncontrollable. I couldn't fight back, couldn't move. I was a doll in the hands of its maker.

He grunted as he moved against me.

"Will you tell me? Will you tell me who he is?" He spat out now. Words I had heard before, words that meant everything.

I lifted my head and looked into his eyes.

_Don't you know?_

A glimmer of recognition shown in them before being overtaken by some stronger emotion.

_He is you._ I thought sadly.

I felt my strength ebb away, felt my head spin, and then the blanket of darkness came, and without a second thought I stepped up to meet it, overjoyed by the chance to get out of this world and all the pain it caused me.


	2. Chapter 2: A Glimpse

**Author's note**: Wow, okay, so it's been like what, six months? I'm terribly sorry. It's been a whirlwind of things that have kept me from writing. For one, I've been focusing on my own project for a while now, so I was giving that more effort than this. Sorry to the people who were reading this, I know you were enjoying it, and, well, hey, here's your second chapter. Now that it's summer, I'm hoping to get a chapter out at least once or twice a week. Please enjoy, and review! Constructive criticism needed here.

_Disclaimer:_ I do not own Twilight. Wish I did, but… I don't :/

My eyelids fluttered open to the growing light that shined through the metal bars at the top of the room.

I moved my aching body across the straw on the ground, gasping at the sharp pain that cut across my leg. I clenched my teeth as I rolled the jean on my left leg up to my knee. A large purple spot lay on my calf, obstructing the pale white skin underneath it.

"Great." I rasped out. Another bruise to add to my growing collection.

I dragged myself toward the wooden door on the far side of the room, cringing as my leg came in contact with the hard ground.

A tray of food sat on the floor, put there by my keeper. It had a bowl with lumps of grey food in it. Oatmeal. I grabbed the glass of water next to it, draining it in one gulp, turning the cup upside down for any drops I'd missed.

I forced myself to take the bowl, gagging as I dipped my hand inside and put the food into my mouth. I didn't want to eat this, but it was the only way for me to get any type of strength. Twice a day I would receive a meal, three times if he was feeling particularly generous.

I sighed after finishing my food, leaning against the door. I'd been in this hole for months now, abused and hurt so much that it had become a routine that I was used to. It hadn't always been like this, Jacob… hadn't always been like this. Tears stung my eyes as I thought of what he'd become.

I didn't understand. One day we were happily together, married, in love. Then I got pregnant. Pregnant… I took a deep breath. And I lost the baby. Miscarriage. And, for some reason, Jacob went insane.

No one could calm him, absolutely no one. Members of his wolf pack tried to make him see sense, tried to make him understand that this, this happened. But… He was past words and advice.

He'd ran, taking me with him, to a secluded house in the country, with no neighbours for miles around. A perfect place to commit acts deemed unsuitable by the public.

At first I'd thought he'd gotten better; his smile radiant, his speech soft and beautiful. But it was all just a hoax. A hoax I'd believed.

The first time it happened, I was sitting outside on the porch, trying to knit a scarf in the light of the setting sun. Jacob appeared from behind one of the many trees behind the house, a bat in his hand.

I remember saying hi, smiling up at him. When he didn't smile back, a shiver of unease had gone through my body. His face had chilled me to the bone, still did too, in my dreams. He had a burning torch lit in his dark eyes, a growl coming from between his teeth.

He stomped up the steps to the porch, grabbing me like a doll and flinging me against the wall.

_"Jacob!" _I had yelled. No difference. A slow, evil smile had spread across his face, instantly stopping me from what I had been about to say.

_"That's right. You listen to me now." _He'd snarled. I didn't say anything. What could I do? He was so much bigger than me. So much stronger. Me, the wind could blow me away like a leaf on the forest floor. There was nothing I could've done to fight back. Nothing.

The rest of the story is stained with shadows, with hurt and pain. My pain, his pleasure. He'd thought he was making another child. I thought he was destroying himself.

When I didn't bare him any children, his moods grew stronger, and occurred more frequently.

It was then he decided to toss me in here, he couldn't stand the sight of me, he had said. I was a curse, a dead weight to him.

I sighed, pulling my mind out of unwanted memories.

I felt filthy, uncouth.

"Look at yourself Bella." I whispered. "Nothing but a disappointment."

I looked at my fingernails; they were caked with dirt.

"Edward come on!" A voice startled me from my task. I heard a rustle from outside.

"Wait." A voice hissed.

I held my breath, sliding over to the small barred window on the bottom of the wall. I pressed my face up against it, careful to keep my breathing silent.

"Edward!" A vexed whisper.

A pair of shoes appeared by my hiding place, nearly causing me to shriek. I slapped a hand over my mouth, stopping any sound from coming out.

"Emmett, relax okay?" A voice, smooth as velvety chocolate chuckled with humor.

The feet wore a pair of black dress shoes, the person wearing a pair of black slacks. I couldn't see his torso or face.

Another figure was visible. He was further away, so I could see his body; Big and muscular, buff. He had curly brown hair, and dimples when he grinned. He wore a white chemise, curled up to his elbows, and a pair of black slacks as well.

"Fine brother. But make it quick." I noticed how his skin was pale white, whiter than any human being I'd seen before.

"Do you here that?" The man I presumed to be Edward said, his feet moving closer to where I was.

"Here what? Edward come on, we're going to be late." Emmett replied, struggling to keep his voice down.

"There's someone here." Edward said softly.

Emmett groaned.

"I can't be late to my own wedding okay? Rosalie'll kill me."

Edward let out a light laugh.

"This is what, your tenth time? Or your twentieth? I can never keep track."

Emmett laughed along with him.

"I can. The honeymoons aren't exactly forgettable you know." He sounded smug about it.

"Oh please. Do spare me." Edward said.

"Will you please _come on?_"

Edward slowly began walking towards his brother.

"Fine." He said. "Something's happened here Emmett. Something dark." It was a remark.

I wanted to know who he was.

"No time to be a hero now Edward. We gotta go." Emmett said, already disappearing into the foliage.

Edward made to leave, but he turned his head, glancing at my hiding place. His face took my breath away. He was like an ice prince, with head of beautiful bronze hair, his eyes the color of butterscotch. I swear on my soul he saw me then. His eyes widened, his mouth opening to form words.

"Edward!" Emmett's voice sounded from the trees.

I saw the way he forced himself to turn around, gracefully leaping into the forest like a deer.

He was gone, and I was alone once again.

I was still frozen in place, shocked at having been in such close proximity to people.

Edward. Beautiful, handsome. Mysterious.

I wanted to know more. I needed to know more.

I would do what I always did.

I would wait.


	3. Chapter 3 : Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

**Alrighty! I've probably lost the small amount of fans I had due to my lack in updating. Remember the promise that said something about updating every week? Uh….. 'cringes' kind of never happened. Sooo, here's my **_**new and improved**_** statement xD; I will update when I can. Busy bee, that's me! **

**So, we left off with Bella catching a glimpse of a beautiful—sexy—, handsome—freaken hot—, you get my point, man. Or is he a man? We all know the answer to that one so there really is no point in me walking down that famous lane. This chapter isn't that long, I was going to write more, but then I decided to just get some points across first—thoughts and perspectives. So, this is more to wet your appetite in anticipation for the next few chapters. I do hope you enjoy! Leave me some questions, comments; I am always open to new ideas, suggestions, and criticism (as long as it's ****constructive.****)**

_**Disclaimer: **__**Don't Own.**_

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I sat against the wall. I counted the flecks of dirt on the ground to the left of me. I tried to guess the months I had spent in this hellhole. Jacob's idea of a punishment. I had given up trying to leave it a long time ago. I wondered what the rest of my life would be like. Would I grow old and die here? Never to be heard from again? They would write of me in years to come. Bella Black, never found, husband grieving for the loss of beloved wife. They would forget, then. They would comfort Jacob, comfort the enemy, the twisted and disturbed man who would not take no for an answer. And my body would rot, decay; stink up the small room in which I was now held.

Room. A name for an enclosed space. Most of the time applied to houses, or livable areas. This was no room. It could be described more as four brick walls and a roof. Maybe the size of your average living room; a wooden door, locked day and night, a small opening on the bottom where my meals were shoved through a flap and thrust onto the ground. A small gap on the wall adjacent to the one that held the door, metal prison bars blocking any measly attempt at escape. Another gap, larger, more of a window, across from the door; the same set of metal bars blocking the light that reached inside. How I wanted to feel that light. Just once. Once more before I died. How I wanted to feel the warm summer air, the brisk fall breeze, the bite of winter, the life of spring. Such small things, unnoticed when living in society. In such a sophisticated world, human beings forgot the most aesthetic of things. In one moment, nature was stripped of its attention, replaced by machines; the next laptop, the fastest sport's car… Such superficiality, such nonsense. Place a human being in a cage; keep them locked up for months, and they would forget of such things. They would remember only the bare necessities.

I clenched my hand into fists. It was nice to dream; it was my only way to cope with reality. I let my fingers relax, sliding my hands against the ground and picking up straw. Straw was my only friend, my bed rest, my feather pillow in this fortress of destruction. The rats were my friends too. They crawled across the floor at night, squeezing themselves through the bars on the gap in the wall, chattering to each other as they hunted for scraps of leftover food. The only food they received were those I provided for them. I sometimes kept myself from eating, watching instead a family of rats nourish themselves on the porridge I obtained everyday. They enjoyed it much more than I.

Another day, another night. Jacob had not visited me since his questioning. His interviews would lead to nothing but his own demise. Such a sad and miserable soul. I wondered how I could have caused a once vibrant man full of life to turn into such a pitiful shadow of himself. Was I the cause? I must have been. I had done this to him; ruined his natural rights. Had I fallen in love with a non-existent being? Had he been pretending, all that time? No. He couldn't have been. Such emotional depth, passion, could not be called on lightly or at any given time.

I gazed down at myself. I wore a pair of scruffy jeans accompanied by a black t-shirt that had not seen a washing machine in months. I had not bathed in weeks; such a privilege was to be earned, Jacob had stated. And even when I did bathe, my clothes remained the same. My feet were left bare, susceptible to anything and everything. During the cold nights Jacob would throw in a small blanket, one that was made for a child, it's thin cloth doing nothing to dispel the chill that would infiltrate my skin.

I had nothing to do. I had no idea what day it was, what month, year. I had lost track of time a while ago. Only one thought could keep me entertained for the better part of my empty hours. His face. A face of masculine beauty that oozed raw power. The strong lines of his jaw, the curve of his lips. The porcelain white of his skin, skin that seemed to glimmer in the light. I had seen him in the shadows, his eyes and hair contrasting sharply with the darkness that had surrounded him. That head of bronze; I wondered what it would be like to run my hands through such an untamable mass. And those eyes, eyes that could pierce me with any look, warm and vibrant—golden ore. They melted me to my core. I had seen him. And I had waited. And I still did. I had decided that since it was clear that I would never get out of this place, I could think of whatever and whomever I wished.

Edward.

I could think of him. A man I had seen only once before, but a man who had left his mark on my soul. No man could be so beautiful and still portray masculinity. His body could be compared to statues of Michelangelo's work.

I sighed. I would never see him again, it seemed. My life was destined for darkness. I could only wish, dream and wish for what I wanted. And what I wanted was simple.

I wanted to live.

Live life. Love. Feel again.

And yet, I knew that might never happen.

And because of that, I was alright. I had faced my fears long before now. If I had to choose between dying angry and alone, and dying at peace and alone, I would choose the latter. It was unhealthy to produce so much negative energy. Although I hadn't forgiven Jacob completely, I had still absolved him of many of his actions, for he still held a place in my heart. And little as that place might be, I could not destroy it, no matter what I did, no matter what I was forced to endure by his hands.

If only life were easy. If only life were predictable and simple.

But, if that were the case, there would be no love.

Because love was complicated.

And hate wasn't.


End file.
